Epilogue

I thought it was about bloody well time I posted this. It’s been six months since I left China. Five of them were spent at my parents’ place, regrouping back in Ann Arbor. This last month, however, has been another, rather significant readjustment.

Two days after my twenty-seventh birthday, I packed up my Honda Element with practically everything I owned and moved to Alexandria, Virginia. Since then, I’ve been acquainting myself with the Washington, DC area, loving the museums, the architecture, and of course, moving in with dear friends from Wyoming.

Now that I’ve had an acceptable grace period after leaving China, I can look back and honestly say I am glad I spent a year abroad, going far outside of my comfort zones. There are still times (more often than I would have expected), even after six months of being away from what I’d become used to in China, when I notice differences between the Chinese and American cultures, and I find myself still making the occasional comparison.

Surprisingly, there are elements of China that I find I miss, or that, looking back, I really admired about the country. The public transportation system, particularly in Beijing, was miraculous, now that I am experiencing our own American version. When I lived in Beijing, I was immediately astounded by not only the availability and ease of the system, but also the expense. You could go practically anywhere for less than the equivalent of a dollar a day. Here, the average commute on public transport can be around ten dollars a day. This is a cheap alternative to a car?

There are also odd times when I’ll overhear a Chinese conversation and think, hey! I actually understood a few words of that! Yet, I find it difficult to believe myself when I tell people that I’ve spent a year in China. They ask me questions and I have a hard time answering with what I’m sure they want as a quick and easy answer. The trouble is, there isn’t one. It’s a complicated answer. And when I do find the words, it doesn’t really feel as though I’m telling the truth, as though the inquisitors are expecting more than what it was. However, when I think of some of the things that I put up with, some of the cultural differences I learned about, and all the hurdles I trampled on and tripped over, I’m convinced that I had one of the more unique abroad experiences.

But, when all is said and done, I am very glad to be back in a country that does not make being a vegetarian practically impossible. And now that I have plans that will hopefully take me through future adventures, I’m encouraged and curious about what the next step will bring. Living in DC will be an exciting adventure in itself. Already, I’ve been dazzled by the architecture and the surrounding buzz of what it is to live in the Capitol environ.

I’m determined to continue writing and have decided to begin a whole new blog, not simply just for DC, but one that will encapsulate all locales. This blog will actually be split in two: One, the Traveller’s Edition of Peregrinus Poeta, will just be a diarrhea of prose, I’m sure – one that may explore where I am, both geographically and intellectually, even if that changes. The other, the Writer’s Edition of Peregrinus Poeta, aspires to be simply a self-indulgent whining of the struggle of writing. You know, something all writers tend to do.

Saved the Best for Last

Today, the Great Wall of China - Changcheng. My aunt Marty and I hired a driver to take us to the Mutianyu section (about an hour outside the city) and back again. This is the section of the Wall that I’ve heard the most about. Not a lot of tourists – I could count on two hands the number of people there today. A good exercise, with steep gradient and large stretch open to the public between hazardous areas. And cool ways to get up and down: we opted for the cable car on the way up, and louge/toboggan on the way down. I felt like I had my own Cool Runnings taste of the winter Olympics.

It was the perfect day for the long haul. Sunny, warm, hardly any wind, and serenely silent. Most of the snow had melted, so slippery wasn’t much of a factor, even if vertigo was. The last leg we traversed was an incredibly steep incline, but well worth the climb. It took several breaks on the way to the top, but once up there, the view took away any breath we had left.

We spent two and a half hours trudging up and down the steps, scaling the slopes, and snapping as many shots as my shutter allowed. But I have to say, the louge ride down was pretty exciting, having never sped down a mountain side as such speeds before.

So, on my last full day in China, I ended my time here with a big bang. All I have done in the past three days has been extraordinary; and if for nothing else besides the Great Wall, I would tell people to come to Beijing.

Expat-Turned-Tourist

Yesterday being the last day of Chinese Spring Festival – the day of the Lantern Festival – it meant that it was also the last day anyone was allowed to set off fireworks within the city. That being the case, this morning the streets and alleys were littered with the detritus of these noisemakers. There were moments last night when I thought I was in the middle of an air raid.

But today, I crammed in a marathon of sight seeing in only about six hours. This, of course, after being wakened at 4:00 am to watch the Canadian/USA Olympic hockey face-off. Being American-born, I was routing for team USA. However, my entire family is Canadian (and I have dual citizenship); so it only felt right not to be too sore of a loser. Besides, it is fitting that they won, hockey being their national sport and all. That, and they would have probably drowned me in the toilet, otherwise.

This morning, I went back to the Forbidden City and this time was able to go in. After several major temples that all seemed to have similar names (Hall of Heavenly Peace and Tranquility, Hall of Harmony and Longevity, etc.), and entering and exiting through so many courtyards, the Imperial Gardens and surrounding “city” is incredible. It is a maze, a labyrinth of inner temples, small shrines, tiny courtyards, and ceremonial rooms dedicated to so many ancient arts. It is so easy to get lost in there – and I nearly did.

In the afternoon, I made my way over to the Summer Palace (in winter snow) and befriended a small group of lovely British travelers. One was living and working here in Beijing, and the other two were visiting as tourists. We decided to link up and walk around the gardens together. I'm so grateful we did, because, looking back on it now, the grounds within the walls of the Summer Palace are vast and twisted. Just like the Forbidden City, it would be easy to spend days in there and not get to it all.

The beauty of this place is practically indescribable, especially with a new powdering of snow. It is hard to believe you are in the middle of an enormous city. Once inside the grounds, particularly once you have climbed up and over the “mountain,” sound is so muffled that it could almost be called silence. To me, this was one of the best features – a getaway from the noise of the city. I felt like stopping on the path and writing a poem in the snow. But I was too damn cold.

Squeezing It All In

In the spirit of send-off, since I've booked a flight back to the States for this coming Wednesday, I thought I would spend the last few days I had left in Beijing doing the typical touristy things one normally does when in a foreign country. Even after living in Beijing for three months, I still had not seen the Great Wall, Tian'anmen Square, the Forbidden City, or the Summer Palace. So, I figured that would take up the majority of my time over the next three days.

Today, after having lunch at an Indian restaurant with my friend Tara, we took the subway to Tian'anmen and snapped a few pictures in the snapping cold. Unfortunately, I was forbidden entrance into the Forbidden City, since its gates close at an early 3:30 in the afternoon. However, we did climb the peak of JingShan Park ("Hill of Scenic Beauty") to take an aerial photo of the Forbidden City rooftops - something that looked entirely different than what I had expected.

After a day of shmoozing Mao, I believe tomorrow the Summer Palace is in order. If I finish early enough, I may make it to the Forbidden City on the way back from Summer Palace just in time before it closes for the day. However, I'm going to have to conquer tomorrow's challenge of sleep-deprivation, as the entire household has set our alarm clocks for 4:00 am. When you live with Canadians, watching the final Olympic hockey game (Canadians vs. team USA) is mandatory. Of course, I'll be the only outcast, routing for the Red White and Blue. Stars and Stripes, baby!

Tuesday's agenda: the Great Wall.

You win, Red

I was watching a bit of the Olympic speed skating yesterday morning while waiting for the next train to SanYuanQiao for another job interview. As I watched, I felt a lot like one of those skaters – never the one in the lead, but always a few paces behind… the minute they catch momentum, they must turn another corner and every pathway suddenly becomes congested; they are blocked once again from gaining a promotion on the ice.

Yes, I feel a lot like that. My second job interview this week was another disappointment. I showed up, but they didn't. I'm tired of being jerked around. On top of that, the latest development: my aunt and uncle are moving back to North America come the first week of May. So, as of Cinqo de Mayo, I will no longer have a place to live in Beijing.

Walking to the subway station in the morning, a familiar song got stuck in my head. Daughtry’s “Going Home.” Not the greatest song, but one of whose lyrics I’m currently jealous. Then, I realized that, for the past few weeks, maybe longer, I have been given scores of "Yankee Go Home" signs. It's time I threw in the towel. It isn’t giving up at this point, is it? I’ve tried to make a go of it. Even so, I guess I must admit defeat. China beat me down. I got submitted.

If I go, I resign myself to shacking up at my parents' home in Michigan for six months, just until I move to the PhD location - wherever that may be. Better to struggle through the job hunt in your own language, though, right?

Just when you think you're safe...

A gloomy day today. I woke up this morning to a rejection email from one of the eleven PhD programs I applied to. I was not accepted. Total bummer. Ten more replies left. I’m waiting in agony.

Then, I had to travel an hour and a half outside of the city for a job interview that I thought would be the perfect solution to my joblessness. They want to hire me, but now I'm not so sure I want to accept.

So, because I am a tad anal retentive, I’ve made a list of pros and cons for two job prospects: the pros and cons list for the school outside the city, and the pros and cons list for taking on private tutoring once again.

The School - pros:
*Meet cool international folks
*A more interesting curriculum to follow
*4,000 RMB airfare reimbursement
*Nice living quarters at the school during the week

The School - cons:
*Hell of a commute
*Food, especially vegetarian, will be an issue (they serve only Chinese... with lots of meat)
*Less salary than expected without the ability to add more hours
*Must cover all expenses for working visa, including another trip to Hong Kong that I cannot afford
*Boring location, surrounded by nothing... even the trees look like stiff soldiers that aren't allowed to grow wild

Private Tutoring - pros:
*Probably make more money, if I keep a good schedule
*Control my own hours
*Food will not be an issue
*Live with family and do not have to commute back and forth on weekends

Private Tutoring - cons:
*No airfare reimbursement (but I'll probably be able to make it through working more hours)
*Probably a more boring curriculum

Hmmm... Easy decision. I think I'll be more comfortable staying in the city and taking the tutoring jobs when I can get them. If I manage my time wisely, I could make up towards 20,000 RMB each month - double what I expected to make at the school.

I wish so much that I could stick my pride in my back pocket and just fly on home. But I don't want to be a coward. I really don't. I am just so tired of struggling to keep my head above water. I just keep thinking that I only have to put up with this for five months. Then, I'll look back and be proud that I didn't crumble and come running home with my tail between my legs (however tempting that sounds). But what would I be coming back to? I'd just have to do the same frustrating job hunt at home. Only, I would be doing it in my own language.

When I got back this afternoon, I had a cup of tea to calm down. It helped me to regroup. So, tomorrow morning I have another interview and I begin the whole rigamarole all over again. This time with a tutoring agency. Next week I have another interview, in case tomorrow's doesn't work out. And there's another one on hold as back up.

Tomorrow should be better.

Blood Ties

So, it's true. You sign your name in blood to get a good job here in China. Today, the school that is hiring me sent me to have a medical examination, a thorough physical. ECG, ENT, chest x-ray, and a partridge in a pear tree. You name it; they did it. I even had to spill out three vials of blood. There you go, China. Now you own even my DNA. Remember the days when couples used to have to get blood tests before they were allowed to be married? I'll find out on Friday afternoon whether China and I are compatible. Something tells me I may end up with a false positive. But as long as it gets me a paycheck for the next five months, I'll endure the temporary custody of matrimonial obedience. Then, come mid-July, I'm getting a divorce. And I'll be damned if I have to pay alimony. First marriages are just test drives anyway, right? You should always marry for money at least once in your life. I've got mine over and done with. Next time, I'm getting hitched the old fashioned way.